Recently I’ve been playing 2009’s Wolfenstein, the most recent game in the classic Wolfenstein series. Or no, wait. It’s a remake. Or… is it a reboot? Either way, the game is… alright. The game still takes place in World War II and you’re still shooting Nazis. The story is like something out of a pulp fiction comic, the pseudo open world mechanic doesn’t come off nearly as smoothly as it should, the boss fights are stupid, and the acting is dumb. However, two things game this game worth playing: the explosions, and the weapons. In this article I’m going to detail what exactly about these two aspects made this game so enjoyable.
The explosions in Wolfenstein are as enjoyable as they are because of the game’s physics. Clutter is just about everywhere in the game’s environments, from crates and barrels to towels and filing cabinets. All of them fly apart into pieces at the slightest hint of an explosion, and there’s something almost childishly satisfying about reducing the contents of a room into piles of garbage.
But what are the explosions without the weapons that cause them? Wolfenstein’s weapons start out rather vanilla, but eventually you’ll start finding experimental Nazi weapons, and with the game’s surprisingly fun weapon upgrades, they only get more ridiculous from there. The upgrades actually change the appearance of the weapon, so even the more historically accurate guns start looking like some kind of sci-fi/steampunk powerhouse. For this list, I’ll start with the simpler weapons first and work my way up to the best.
Leichenfaust 44 aka The Hadouken Cannon:
After a brief spin-up, the Leichenfaust fires a giant blue fireball that disintegrates anything in its path before exploding on whatever surface unfortunate enough to stand in its path. Not only does it melt Nazis, reducing them to bloody skeletons. Not only does it make physics objects flee like The Great Destroyer of Tiny Things has come for them. The absolute icing on the Nazi-assembled, dragon punch-resembling cake comes after firing. Once the Leichenfaust fires, its barrels rotate, and then the gun dings.
It DINGS, like a goddamn toaster.
Adding a ding to the end of a weapon’s reload – much like Fallout 3’s Fat Man – is so satisfying. Every gun should have it.
And there you have it. Wolfenstein may not be the most thought-provoking, innovative game to come out in recent years, but it is certainly worth playing just to check out the insane weapons.